The Diary of a Miserable Girl
by fanfictionusername
Summary: A diary of a girl who is new to shinigami life and experiences a lot of things. Flames will be used to bake more cookies. Rated for bad language
1. Entry 1

**I hope this fic isnt too unoriginal :(...Flames will be used to bake cookies.**

_January 2, Thursday, 11:53pm._

_Dear Diary, today I graduated from the academy and was taken in to 11th division. I'm so excited! I cant wait to meet up with my fellow shinigami there tomorrow! I can barely sleep! What's more, it is said that the 11th division is the strongest squad in the Gotei 13! "Zaraki Kenpachi" huh... They say he's a really tough guy. Hope I dont get smushed by his so-called amazing spirit force. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: happy/excited)_

_January 4, Saturday, 1:09am_

_Dear Diary….The hell with it! Today or should I say yesterday was my first day in that acursed division and I'm not very happy. Some bald dude I met at the training grounds was just so cocky and arrogant so I volunteered to spar with him. He said he didn't want to just because I was female and a new recruit! That baldy! Then he later called his gay friend with retarded feathers in his eyes, told him the Gotei 13 would take in anybody who can swing a sword. That bastard! Not even a seated member. I was then assigned to deliver paperwork and pour tea on my first day. What a bunch of knuckleheads! I'm gonna sleep now, I feel a migraine coming along. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: mad/ready to break a neck. )_

_January 5, Sunday, 2:35am_

_That Zaraki Kenpachi is one freakin hell of an ass! Bumped into him this afternoon, I apologized to him and he asked me my name, he says my name was too girlish and blabbered on for 10 minutes about how his new recruits were "disappointing". Then Kusajishi Yachiru his pink-haired lieutenant latched on to my head and messed up my hair which took me 2 whole hours to untangle! And fine, so those two buffoons yesterday were high seated officers, Ayasegawa Yumichika called me "ugly" while I was fixing my hair. Well he's too much of a narcissist for a 5__th__ seat. And Madarame Ikkaku that bald bastard told me I'm too conscious of my appearance. Just because that 3__rd__ seat is jealous of my long, soft, and silky pigtails doesn't mean he can judge me like that. My head hurts. Tomorrow I look forward to a relaxing day at the spa to wash away my anger. __Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: angry/very angry.) _

_January 5, Sunday, 8:12pm_

_...Those assholes! Today at the spa I just happened to be in the hot spring when the demons from work crashed and destroyed half of the hot spring! They claimed to be playing "football" in the middle of the streets that just so happened to be in front of the spa. My cured head was even throbbing partly because of anger and because a brick hit my head. That bald bastard even said "dont cry". Thanks to them my head is in a worse shape. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: frustrated/in pain.)_

_January 6, Monday, 10:35pm_

_Today was the BEST Monday ever! I was ordered to distribute papers to all the divisions then I accidentally skipped 10th division so I rushed to their office and barged in without knocking like the idiot I am. I saw a short white-haired kid inside. Naturally I apologized for being rude and for delaying his work. He was just so cute and...cute... He said not to worry about it and that I can go back to my own division now. Then I noticed his haori. And realized I was crushing on a captain. Oh why oh why couldnt I have been in the 10th division...why...? What did I do to make god hate me so much? Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: miserable/unhappy)_

**Thanks for reading and review me if you want to critisice me for being too unoriginal -sob!- Anyway I still had fun writing this! :) till next time!**


	2. Entry 2

**Here's the second chapter and I hope you all like it! **

_January 7, Tuesday, 10:15pm_

_My week is currently being flushed down the toilet. A little while ago that retard Zaraki Kenpachi assigned me, that bald bastard, and that narcissist bastard into a mission. But sure I'm grateful since this is my first mission and all but somehow I am not excited. I think I'm not even looking forward to it. Oh and Kusajishi-fukutaicho gave me a nickname; I dont really mind being called Mori-chan. I think it's cute. Which is why me and Yachiru are in good terms now. Which scares me a little. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: bored/indifferent)_

_January 8, Wednesday, 11:45pm_

_Today I actually met sane people! I met Matsumoto Rangiku in the women's restroom! We chatted a little and told a little about ourselves, then she actually invited me to go drinking in a bar but sadly, I am underage. Instead she told me we could walk home together! And as I got out of 11th division (hell), I saw her running and waving towards me. I noticed how amazingly attractive she was so I was staring at her in awe for the entire time we were walking and so I bumped my head against a tree branch. How freakin embarrasing. Then she apologized and told me to go on ahead cuz she forgot something. Another thing, I actually forgot to ask her what division she is in and what her rank is. Owell. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: overjoyed/in pain)_

_January 10, Friday, 12:07am_

_OMG I'm sooo tired! This morning I had to run around Seireitei cuz Kenpachi that half-assed bastard and Yachiru went missing after a hollow extermination near the outskirts of Rukongai. In the end we found them both on the roof of 9th division, relaxing. Then I skipped lunch because I had to fill in for someone who was escorting a few spoiled nobles around Seireitei. In the afternoon I miraculously found myself all the way in the 2nd division being a practice doll for shooting poison darts, I got a few narrow cuts but nothing major. At dinnertime I ate so much I forgot I had to submit a the reports to Soutaicho so I did my best shunpoing and carrying a pile of papers. As I was finally going home I spotted a fellow shinigami injured on the side of the rode so again, I did my best shunpoing to 4th division with him on my back. Then I kind of passed out on the sofa and napped for a little while. Then I finally went home. Being a fulltime shinigami is so hard. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: exhausted/still in pain)_

_January 10, Friday, 9:33pm_

_At lunch today my muscles were still hurting from yesterday so as I carried my tray my knees felt weak so I tripped and spilt chicken soup all over Hisagi Shuuhei, 9th division fukutaicho. I was sooo embaressed! But he just laughed it off and offered to help me up despite my protests and apologies. He was a nice guy, we ate together but he had to leave early because his captain was calling him. Anyways, he told me little about his tattoo and the scar on his face. Chatting with him made me feel better. I think I'm finally getting used to shinigami life. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: overjoyed/proud of myself)_

_January 11, Saturday, 7:30pm_

_Zaraki Kenpachi had me leave early today so that I could prepare for the mission tomorrow. Even if it was just the usual hollow-extermination. As I was walking in the hallway 6th division's fukutaicho (I think) Abarai Renji waved to me. Weird, so I waved back. Maybe Matsumoto-san or Hisagi-fukutaicho told him about me. Doubt it. And a little while ago Yumichika and Ikkaku actually visited me without breaking anything. They said they wanted to see where I lived so since they went through the trouble of finding my house I served them dinner. After that with bickered a bit and they left saying they shouldnt intrude much longer. That explains that we are now friends. It freaked me out. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: freaked out/kinda happy)_

**That's it for now and I would appreciate if you reviewed. Thanks. :D**


	3. Entry 3

**When I make fanfics I like to update fast! Kindly point out any misspells, I'm very careless. Thank you.**

_January 13, Monday, 3:00am_

_Whew...Okay I'm gonna explain the events of my mission in great detail so you better read carefully! So, I arrived almost late at the meeting place and Ikkaku and Yumichika were already there, yelling at me as I plugged my ears, well Ikkaku did most of the yelling, then we went on shunpoing to watchamacallit district in Rukongai. We spotted the hollows and the numbers seemed a little too big for a three-men team. Anyway Ikkaku and Yumichika quickly went into action, so I followed them. They were killing hollows so fast I couldnt catch up with them, so I stupidly went for the biggest one. Not exactly a menos but close enough. "Kill the silence, Reaper" XD so I said that and I began roasting all the visible hollows. Too bad I didnt notice I was also simmering two shinigami behind me. After that I missed my chance on gaining extra credit cuz not only did I accidentally hit my teammates but I also burned the surrounding areas which includes the trees, and houses. Fuck. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: depressed/miserable)_

_January 13, Monday, 9:36pm_

_I felt bad about what I did so I visited Ikkaku and Yumichika in 4th division that morning. Luckily their wounds arent that serious, only minor burns and scalds. Then I forgot to do the mission report. Shit. After I did a crappy report (but still presentable) I rushed to Zaraki Kenpachi's office and submitted the form to him. And he said, "The report?! I dont give damn about reports!" What an ass. "But I think Yumichika already submitted one." Then I became a bit teary-eyed. I'm so useless.. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: still depressed/sad)_

_January 14, Tuesday, 10:10pm_

_MY DEPRESSION IS CURED!! Earlier today when I was still depressed I was looking out the window where you can see the beautiful view of 10th division and a grass field. I was randomly gazing in one of the windows then I suddenly saw Hitsugaya-taicho glancing at me!! I was like, oh my god, but then I tried to look cool and walk away.. but I tripped and fell down, again. I went beet red and guess who came to my rescue? HITSUGAYA-TAICHO HIMSELF! He asked if I was alright and said "That looked liked it hurt so much." It really did. He helped me up and handed me a few papers. "Here, might as well give you this, be more careful next time." He said in his cute voice and left me there sitting like a lovestruck fool. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: lovestruck/happy)_

_January 15, Wednesday, 8:24pm_

_When I was ready to go home a while ago Yachiru and the 8th division fukutaicho Ise Nanao asked me to come with them for a moment. They lead me to an office (I didnt notice 'Shinigami Women's Association' written on the door okay?!) with lots of high seated female shinigami. "Nee, nee, Mori-chan join the women's association!" Yachiru told me. I was speechless. I tried not to look like an idiot with I-would-be-honored-to-join! written all over my face. My mind was like, OH MY GOD THERE WAS SOMETHING LIKE THIS?! I CANT BELIEVE YOU WANT ME IN! Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: happy/very happy)_

_January 16, Thursday, 11:45pm_

_My hell started again today. Early in the morning Ikkaku finally let me spar with him but sadly I lost cuz I havent been practicing my single sword skills. After that I was all sweaty and yucky so I decided to have a quick shower in the division's washroom. Too bad Ikkaku that bald fool didnt knock or look carefully at the sign that said "Women" I wasnt like, "ACK! IKKAKU YOU BALD PERVERT!" But I was like, "Oh hi there." Then I grabbed a towel and covered his face, then I broke his nose. It bled a lot. And I shoved him out. After that somehow I was cranky the whole day. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: proud of myself/cranky)_

**There you have it! It's so fun writing stuff like this! Thanks for reading _and review_**


	4. Entry 4

**It took me quite a while to finish this... I am angry at myself because all my hard work was flushed down the drain in a matter of seconds. Hope you like this chapter then.**

_January 17, Friday, 9:10pm_

_Today Zaraki Kenpachi that former half-assed bastard actually assigned me to a mission tomorrow morning! I was like, "Seriously?!" Then I had this stupid smily face for the whole day. Although I was to go on the mission alone, it's gonna be so lonely ToT, This time, I will definetly NOT screw up again! Oh and I attended my first Shinigami Women's Association meeting today! I was so happy. Even though we didnt do anything important much, it was still really cool! Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: determined/happy)_

_January 19, Sunday, 5:02am_

_I FAILED MY MISSION AGAIN!! Why? I almost got sliced in half that's why! This mission was supposed to really simple actually, but then again, how the hell can a single person search and capture this gigantic hollow asshole!? The nerve of some people in the 12th division! I bet that freak-show Kurotsuchi Mayuri just used me as an experiment! I found the hollow ass alright, failed to capture it. So I killed it instead. At least one good thing came out, I did my mission report properly. I'm just gonna sulk away for the whole Sunday. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: angry/want to kick something)_

_January 20, Monday, 10:55pm_

_Those bitches from 12th division specially came to yell at me. Of course I didnt listen cuz I was busy doing the damn paperwork. Where the hell did they get so much paper? In the afternoon Matsumoto and a few of her friends heard the news and invited me to drink with them. She forgot I was underaged. It was pretty damn hard switching the sake Matsumoto keep giving me to tea. Her drunk friends which includes Hisagi Shuuuhei, Abarai Renji and Kira Izuru came glomping at me. I think I slapped them a little too hard, actually I punched them. To make matters worse, I accidentally gulped down a little sake, felt dizzy. And still is. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: dizzy/slightly drunk, damnit)_

_January 21, Tuesday, 11:32pm_

_THOSE FUCKING BASTARDS! Some of my divisionmates went and played pranks on me the whole day! I mean, at first I didnt mind it since this is 11th division but the last one really cross the line! I had to fetch Zaraki-taicho from a captain's meeting this afternoon, and as I ran to him I felt a foot sticking out and tripped on it. Let me repeat that, I tripped and fell face first in front of all the captains. IT WAS FUCKING EMBARRASING! I could just feel the captains including Hitsugaya-taicho disapprove of me or make fun of me. Life sucks. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: enraged/possibly able to strangle someone.)_

_January 22, Wednesday, 9:34pm_

_Today was very peachy. No seriously. This morning I had to give a tour of the 11th division to the students of the academy. We were currently in the division's cafeteria, suddenly a peach hit my head. Supposedly Yumichika was the one to be hit but he dodged Ikkaku's throw and the peach was thrown to me. I was like, "What the heck" Then I started throwing apples at them both. Which later caused a food fight. AND IT WAS SO FUN! Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: tired/a little high)_

**Thanks to those who reviewed, it really helps my well-being X) Sorry if there's any spelling mistakes or anything :D**


	5. Entry 5

**Here's the next entry! I just got the watermelon idea a while ago while I was eating watermelon. o.O**

_January 23, Thursday, 10:23pm_

_After the peach incident me, Ikkaku, and Yumichika were ordered to clean it all up. Honestly, cant they think up of any more punishments?! Zaraki-taicho scolded us mostly for not calling him or not making the fight more violent. What a crazy man. I met another bitch today, Ichimaru Gin. 3rd division captain. He's such a slut. He went all the way to 11th division to "chat" with us. He ended up leaving on a whim after making another mess we had to clean up. That fox-faced bastard! I hope he hits his head somewhere. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: tired/frustrated)_

_January 25, Saturday, 4:11am_

_OMG OMG OMG I cant sleep! Not after the greatest thing possible happened this afternoon!! I was hungry and went to the main cafeteria for a little snack (cuz the food in 11th division sucks), then I saw the last slice of watermelon in the icebox, so I went after it. Then you couldnt believe what happened! As I reached my hand out I saw a hand reaching for it too. HITSUGAYA-TAICHO'S HAND!! EEK! I quickly pulled back and he got the slice which he offered to me. "Here, I'm not that hungry anyway." So I took it from him and he walked away. OMG I think I've become a rabid fangirl! No! Morio you cant stoop so low! NO!! Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: amazingly happy/amazingly craving for some more watermelon)_

_January 26, Sunday, 7:56pm_

_I ate watermelon for breakfast today. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: indifferent/still craving watermelon)_

_January 27, Monday, 9:34pm_

_I met some more bitches today. 9th division captain, Kaname Tosen. His "justice" speeches are getting really old. 2nd division captain, Soifon, "black cat trends" also getting old. 7th division captain, Komamura Sajin, was that a bucket on his head?! Some weird captains we have here. I partly blame this new discovery to Zaraki-taicho, cuz he's the one who practically dragged me to the captain's lounge and introduced me to them. Too bad Hitsugaya-taicho wasnt there. :( Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: tired/slightly disappointed)_

_January 28, Tuesday, 10:15pm_

_It's raining. Hard. Stupid rain. Got rained on this morning and a while ago. Now I got this stupid cold. I want some watermelon. The paperwork also got rained on. Rain sucks. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: in pain/craving watermelon)_

**Thanks for reading! **


	6. Entry 6

**Hope you like this! Writing something about an OC is kinda fun...**

_January 29, Wednesday, 10:59pm_

_I hate getting colds. Only Yachiru and Zaraki-taicho would come near me! What it's not like I'm contagious or anything... sigh I want a promotion.. Being an unseated member sucks. And no I didnt get to do any paperwork today, Ikkaku wouldnt let me near anything. Oh and I sneezed at his bald head too, after that Yumichika finally convinced me to go to 4th division after saying I look ugly with my red nose. I wish someday I would get promoted above that narcissist bastard. Unohana-taicho of 4th division is so motherly, seeing her reminds me of mothers. Doesnt everyone? At least she isnt a bitch. And they didnt have any watermelon there, just some stupid apples. I hate apples. I hate Yamada Hanataro. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: in pain/miserable)_

_January 30, Thursday, 10:32pm_

_I think my cold's getting better, Matsumoto-san gave me a special pill. For now I think the nausea's gone. But I'm suspecting the pill has some sake in it, I can tell cuzI'm feeling kinda dizzy. Wonder where she got it.. Anyway today I asked for a rematch with Ikkaku, I bet he only accepted cuz he felt bad about my cold. I proposed it cuz I wanted to to beat someone up. He won most of the rounds but I totally whooped his ass in the end after I tried sparing with two wooden swords. Unfair? No way! I'm still sick here! After that I still couldnt find any watermelon in the cafeteria. Damnit. I'll just have to wait till Sunday to buy my watermelon. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: proud of myself/craving watermelon)_

_February 1, Saturday, 3:24am_

_I need watermelon. Now. This afternoon there was supposed to be another women's association meeting, and I missed it. I was supposed to pass an important folder to the 12th division but I forgot about it. I was supposed to fetch Yachiru from the lieutenant's meeting, I fucking forgot that too. All because I was thinking about watermelon for the whole day. I'm such a bitch. I was sulking in the restroom when Matsumoto-san showed up, comforted me, and invited me to go to a bar...I gladly accepted. That evening she ordered me a glass of apple martini and was forced to drink it. I now truly despise apples from the bottom of my heart. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: miserable/would kill for a slice of watermelon)_

_February 2, Sunday, 6:48pm_

_I WAS FINALLY ABLE TO BUY MY WATERMELON! I WENT ALL OUT AND BOUGHT TEN OF 'EM! But now I only have 3 left...and recently my wallet feels lighter and lighter. so I've decided to control my cravings and buy only 3 a week, and on special occasions 4. This is gonna be so hard. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: satsfied/full stomach and probably wont eat in another 2 days)_

_February 3, Monday, 11:24pm_

_I saw people die today. There was a surprise hollow attack somewhere in the forests and the 11th division was dispatched. There was even a menos there! So we were fighting there and neither Ikkaku, or Yumichika was there. Just me and a few more shinigami. It was horrible. We werent really out numbered. After I finished the job I looked around me.. 5 dead shinigami. I cried. I called for help. I was covered in blood but you cant see a scratch on me. It was like a nightmare. So much for sleep. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: depressed/sad)_

**Did I make the last one to angsty? Does it kinda look out of place? Well I had to at least put a moment or two like that or else I think it's gonna be a little unrealistic. Please review then! Thanks for reading! :)**


	7. Entry 7

**Here's entry 7 and I hope you like it! 3**

_February 5, Wednesday, 3:22am_

_...Still very depressed, Even though that wasnt my first time seeing someone die, I thought I was going to be alone again. I thought that no matter how much I cried and searched for help, no one was gonna come to me and say "It's alright now". But no, it's not like that anymore, this is different now. I'm a new person, and I am not gonna fall apart from this and I am definetly not gonna cry. Not now, not tomorrow, not ever. I'm Haruzaki Morio. And I cant sleep. I'm still very tired. I think it's raining again... Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: depressed/upset)_

_February 6, Thursday, 4:13am_

_This morning Yumichika noticed my eyebags. He told me if I couldnt sleep I should stand up and try to sleep, if I still cant sleep I should sit down and try to sleep, if I still cant sleep I should find someone to lean on and sleep. Then he smiled at me. I didnt really get it but I think it helped me a little. After that another weird thing happened, Ikkaku noticed how I was struggling to carry some papers in the hall and he helped me. Not sure why but he also told me I shouldnt carry all the burden myself and that it wasnt just my responsibility. How can a few papers be so important? Then as I served Zaraki-taicho some sake he told me that it's best to drink with someone rather than alone. That was kind of vague and creepy. Even when Yachiru asked for some candy she also said to me a bittersweet candy is bitter first and after that is where the sweet part is. What does candy have to do with anything? Then Matsumoto visited me again, she told me to come with her and held my hand tightly. She lead me to restaurant and asked me to have dinner with a few of her friends. We ate and all their jokes somehow made me laugh, Abarai forced me to dance, Hinamori forced me to sing, and Kira caught me when my knees were growing weak from exhaustion. They all walked me home and I said thanked them and they all had warm smiles on their faces. Was I missing something? Somehow this made me happy all of a sudden and before they all turned around to leave, I gathered all my strength to smile and wave at them. I had a feeling I owe them all a big one. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: happy/very happy)_

_February 6, Thursday, 11:44pm_

_TODAY WAS A NEW DAY! And what's a way to start a new day? Be late for work. I overslept this morning and was late 3 hours. Cuz I was late they made me do a huge pile of paperwork! Those meanies. I also had a late lunch and had to eat what's left in the division's cafeteria, you wouldnt believe what I ate so I wont write it down, so for a snack I ate some watermelon and accidentally gulped a seed. The nerve of that watermelon! What else...Oh yeah and I saw the 6th division's captain Kuchiki Byakuya, asked me to give an envelope to Zaraki-taicho then gracefully left bringing his nobility ass with him. Yup things are coming along better now. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: indifferent/still kinda happy)_

_February 7, Friday, 10:16pm_

_Lo and behold! I was able to attend the weekly women's association meeting! I was assigned by Ise-fukutaicho to prepare 5 different kinds of fruit by next week. Why fruit? It's because I wanted it to be fruit got a problem with it? Anyway, of course I'm bringing in watermelon, peach, strawberry, kiwi, and a stinkin apple. Why apple? Cuz I hate it so much it makes me want to put it at the bottom of that list! Kiyone offered to help so I told her to bring in strawberries, peaches, and kiwis. What, but she offered to help! Then as I was going home a random male shinigami picked the wrong day to pick a fight with me. I kicked the bastard in his manhood. That otta show him.. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: bored/excited)_

**Hehe I put all the sweet stuff here because by the next entry I'm putting lots of potty-mouthed words. And yes, doing that is a first for me! I'd appreciate reviews if it's worth the trouble. Thanks for reading!**


	8. Entry 8

**Entry 8 is here and thanks for the reviews! **

_February 8, Saturday, 11:44pm_

_I argued with a short, white-haired kid today. Hitsugaya that fucking bastard! I know just a week before I was falling head over heels for him but now he's a fucking bastard. This, is what happened. It all started again with a freakin watermelon. Again, I was reaching for the last slice then Hitsugaya was also reaching for it. Then he told me that I should have it since he wasnt that hungry anyway. I told him he should have it since I've got more at home. He said he lost his freakin appetite. I asked him why. He said he was reminded of something disgusting. Then I lost it. I yelled at him. Then he asked me if I was having PMS or was just plain cranky. I threw the watermelon away and yelled at him some more. Then he began ranting about how I was wasting food and not respecting my superiors blahblah blah. Then we yelled at each other some more. I accidentally called him beansprout, bastard, and shorty. Then he actually tattle-taled on me like a little kid! They made me write a fucking written apology letter and made me do half the 10th division's paperwork for a week! Those lazy assholes!...I want some apples. Now I realize how disgusting watermelons taste. I also realize how apples are much much cheaper. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: words cannot describe my anger/too busy being a bitch to crave for apples)_

_February 10, Monday, 11:57pm_

_Damnit! I was stuck at 10th division doing the goddamn paperwork! Does Seireitei even need this much freakin paper?! Lost my precious Sunday. I also admit that I was kinda having PMS the other day. Knowing that the little kid was right about something annoys the hell outta me. I'm tired. Well at least the whole time I was doing the goddamn paperwork Matsumoto kept me company. She's so nice... Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: miserable/still too busy being a bitch to crave for apples.)_

_February 11, Tuesday, 10:18pm_

_To top it all up, Zaraki-taicho randomely sent me on another mission, which I am sure to fail again. I am to go through the Senkaimon at midnight and arrive at someplace called "Karakura Town" to provide backup. Stupid missions, I still have a fucking 20 page report to do! And you're probably wondering why I'm wasting my time writing on this crappy notebook. Believe me, I cant go through a day without writing here. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: tired/still miserable)_

_February 12, Wednesday, 6:42am_

_I almost lost an arm a while ago. While I was currently providing backup, that retarded resident shinigami bastard lay there unconsious for the whole time hollows attacked. Those obnoxious hollows ganged up on me so I had to call for help. And while I was too busy not being cut in half, part of the town was being destroyed. Which means I failed. Damnation. I'm now recuperating in the 4th division. They didnt have apples there anymore, just these stupid watermelon candies. I hate watermelon. I hate paperwork. I hate Yamada Hanataro. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: in pain/hateful)_

_February 13, Thursday, 12:32am_

_Zaraki-taicho, Yachiru, Ikkaku, and Yumichika visited me today! They told me all about how they spied Kuchiki-taicho the whole day and putting tabasco sauce in his soup. Thank goodness Yachiru ate all the watermelon candies, seeing them makes me nauseous. And Matsumoto and gang also visited me! I'm so happy. Also, I couldnt believe Hitsugaya dropped by this evening to tell me my punishment is over and that he'll collect the finished paperwork tomorrow, YAY! That kinda makes us even so he's not a fucking bastard anymore! Oh joy. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: happy/overjoyed)_

**Review if there's anything you want to tell me about! Comments are always welcome. Thanks for reading!**


	9. Entry 9

**yeah...**

_February 14, Friday, 6:32pm_

_I got discharged from the 4th division this morning, I'm really grateful that I heal fast or was it just the 4th division's skill? I couldnt care less. But it still hurts. Anyway, today at the women's association meeting I brought the fruit but we ended up discussing something totally different and so I just ate them. My stomach hurts a bit. Probably because of that cursed strawberry. Yumichika told me I look good when in pain, so I pulled his hair. I didnt think kicking him in his manhood would affect him much. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: bored/in pain)_

_February 15, Saturday, 9:39pm_

_Holy shit I completely forgot it was valentines day yesterday. Damnit. No one even bothered to greet me! Those heartless bastards. Oh and a while ago at lunch Matsumoto dared me to steal a bite from Kuchiki's meal. I stupidly accepted it. I cant believe I was idiotic enough to walk up to him, grab his chopsticks, and eat his rice. He stared at me and said that if I dont stop what I was doing..blah blah blah I couldnt hear the rest because I was too busy eating the rest of his meal... Then Renji suddenly carried me on his shoulder and took me back to 11th division. Someday, I'm gonna set that red hair of his on fire. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: miserable/not in pain anymore)_

_February 16, Sunday, 8:25pm_

_I was planning diabolical plans to set Renji's hair on fire. Other than that I was bored the entire day. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: bored/bored enough to milk llamas)_

_February 17, Monday, 10:04pm_

_This boredom is killing me. So I begged Zaraki-taicho to send me on a mission. He told me there wasnt anything I can do yet so he freakin told me to play with Yachiru, which I did. We played tag, and hopscotch, after that she dragged me to tenth division to play can-kicking. When I asked her why she dragged me to 10th division she told me it's more fun to play there. She was right. When I kicked the can I kicked it too hard and it crashed through a window which happened to be Hitsugaya's office. I think the can knocked over his precious paperwork cuz I could hear him shouting as we ran away laughing. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: overjoyed/no longer bored)_

_February 19, Wednesday, 1:13am_

_I fell in the pond today. I FELL IN THE GODDAMN POND! You wanna know why? I'll tell you why, I TRIPPED! That's why! It's so frustrating! Why the hell did the 3rd division had to go and install a retarded pond?! In addition to that, I had to redo the paperwork that fell in the goddamn pond with me! That fox-faced bastard just had to be there to witness the whole scene and laugh uncontrollably. What the hell's so funny about me falling into his retarded pond?! It's a good thing Kira was also there to help me, if not I wouldve been tempted to strangle the fox-faced bastard. This sucks. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: angry/fuming)_

**Thanks for reading! Please click 'Go' in submit review and tell me what you think of this. Now who wants internet cookies? They're chocolate **


	10. Entry 10

**Well then, get readin!**

_February 20, Thursday, 9:53pm_

_Dear Diary...I've only realize how long I havent done that. It seems that I have lost 1/4 of my innocence and good-naturedness. All because of the bitches from work. Soon only a half of my original innocence and good-naturedness will remain, till then, I'll try my best to be a shinigami. This Sunday, I'm planning another spa date, hopefully some bastards wont crash into me again. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: miserable/when am I not miserable?)_

_February 21, Friday, 10:16pm_

_Bullshit! I got into a fight with 3 guys from 10th division. They said I didnt deserve being in the 11th division. I failed to kick the guy who said that. Then they started blabbering on and on about the watermelon incident. That was a helluva long time ago! So I lost it and began beating up the guy who said that. Then his other 2 friends called Hitsugaya. I said they were at fault and at least he believed me. He punished those assholes by getting them to clean the whole hall we were in. I was told to watch them the whole Saturday though, PERFECT! Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: frustrated/want to kick something)_

_February 22, Saturday, 10:49pm_

_My eyes are burning...Someone puked in the hall. I think I'm gonna be sick..I cant wait for tomorrow. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: disgusted/excited)_

_February 23, Monday, 1:34am_

_Okay, I had a great time today. It was nice, really. Except for that fox-faced pervert bastard! Ichimaru that fox-faced pervert bastard was there too. Told me he liked my body. THAT WAS FUCKIN CREEPY! When he saw the look on my face his abnormal smile enlarged. I could feel my blood boiling hotter than the hot spring. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: creeped out/enraged)_

**I'm lacking ideas. Which is why this is so short. I think the humor in this is depleting. Review anyways! Thanks for reading!**


	11. Entry 11

**Okay then ai-bleach here's a bit more HitsuXOC action. Nothing major though. Also thanks to Meng-4-2 for reviewing about 5 times, it really helps! Hope you all like it! :)**

_February 24, Tuesday, 11:48pm_

_Hee hee, Shiro-chan's so cute...Earlier at lunch, I didnt notice there was a piece of rice on my face. I bumped into him cuz he was so short. Then he said I had something on my face, and he took it off for me. Ehe I blame my crappy week for this sudden mood change happiness. I want some rice... Ah well a while ago I found out Matsumoto is Hitsugaya's lieutenant. Again, what did I do so wrong to make god hate me so much? Oh yeah cuz I called him bastard, beansprout and shorty a few days ago. Fiddlesticks. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: lovestruck/craving rice)_

_February 25, Friday, 11:21pm_

_Today, I especially ate 4 extra bowls of rice, and I have no idea why. Then I vomited all over Yumichika, he screamed like a little girl who found her hamster dead. Seriously, if you look at it another way it looks just like porridge! Stupid Yumichika screaming in my ear, Ikkaku and Yachiru were laughing loud enough to wake a baby in Rukongai. Nope I'm just exaggerating. Oh and Hinamori invited me to dinner today, we went to this cute ramen shop. Okay not cute but it had a nice feel inside! We talked about how our captains were. Half the time I was bored since she kept on bablling on and on about "Aizen-taicho". But half the time I was squeeing in joy because she told me all about how Shiro-chan loves watermelon, and that my friend, explains a lot of things. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: overjoyed/happy)_

_February 26, Saturday, 10:34pm_

_Hahaha! Silly Ukitake-taicho. He gave Hitsugaya more candy than usual today. Hm? How did I know that? Mind your own business to whoever is reading this besides me! Ehem, basically Shiro-chan almost drowned in candy today. It was so cute! Then I forgot to do the daily short-report. Conflabbit. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: lovestruck/slightly frustrated)_

_February 27, Sunday, 9:12pm_

_Yeah... Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: feeling lazy/indifferent)_

_February 28, Monday, 10:57pm_

_Since I had nothing better to do a while ago I offered to help with the 6th division's paperwork. Big mistake. Oh why couldnt I have been a good girl and did the crossword Yachiru asked me to do. Kuchiki-taicho just seems too..."noble" to walk away from! Damn these kind-hearted hormones. _

**There! Thanks for reviewing, erm, I mean reading and I hope you'll still be here to read the next chapter! I mean, entry.**


	12. Entry 12

**Entry 12 is here and by request of QueenofBookworms, I'll stop writing in italics. What, it's _that_ annoying? Nah I'm just kidding. X) Just a little humor there, this _is _a humor fic. Right? Now stop wasting your time and get reading.**

March 1, Tuesday, 10:34pm

Finally, after 7 hours on the job, 6th division's paperwork is now compiled and safetly packed for delivery to wherever it's supposed to be delivered. My fingers are numb. I'm still hungry. Apparently; Rice, apples, and a bit of watermelon does not count as a meal for me. Why the hell cant Hitsugaya have some meat instead?! I'm sighing as I write this. Unfortunately, it's my turn to do the rounds tonight and hopefully I dont faint from hunger. Soo...I changed my writing style, like it? You love it? You're too kind. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: hungry/miserable)

March 2, Wednesday, 9:12pm

Renji is a fat bastard. I have just realized it earlier today, at lunchtime. While I was eating my usual lunch, Renji sat down in front of me and began to eat. Roasted duck. That son of a bitch. Then he gulped down some chowder, asshole. He then ate some stir fry, shithead. For dessert he had a fucking sundae. Then he asked me if I wanted some. I glared at him and walked away. At least that's what I wanted to do, instead I almost choked on a watermelon seed, _then_ I glared at him. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: famished/want to make voodoo doll of Renji)

March 3, Thursday, 10:55pm

I miss eating my favorite dinner. A while ago I had to settle food coloring my rice to make it look like croquettes. Sooner or later I'm sure I'll lose it and eat as much as I can...and I already am. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: I'm too busy eating steak to think of my mood right now)

March 4, Friday, 9:31pm

Why the fuck did I even start eating only rice, watermelons, and apples? Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: frustrated/I feel so dumb..)

March 5, Saturday, 11:26pm

This morning the yearly shinigami checkup took place. I cant understand why we need to be checked up we're already dead! It's obviously rare to see a shinigami coughing up blood! Okay there's Ukitake-taicho but still! I almost pity the 4th division. Too bad I hate Yamada Hanataro.

**Liked it? Hated it? Want to erase this story from the face of the earth? Just send me a review and I'm all over it! (The last choice is void guys) Thank you for reading!**


	13. Entry 13

**Well, after this chapter or the next I probably wont update as often as I am right now. School starts tomorrow y'see. :( I hope you enjoy this chapter then! :3**

March 6, Sunday, 8:10pm

I'm tired. I wanna sleep, but I'll write here first. I couldnt enjoy my day off today cuz I spent the entire day fighting those damn hollows that keep popping up in the real world. That Soutaicho ass just have to send in the 11th division. I dont think I even have much energy to swear some more. Good night diary. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: tired/I can drop dead any time now)

March 7, Monday, 10:32pm

I trained with Zaraki-taicho today! He sure can kick some butt. By the way I've got this stupid briuse on my hand that I didnt realize I had till today. Must be because of yesterday. It hurts. I think I'm bleeding again. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: in pain/I'm bleeding!)

March 8, Tuesday, 10:51pm

This stupid bruise just keeps bleeding every 3 hours! Do bruises even bleed?! I went to 4th division a while ago. Hanataro wrapped the bandage too tight. I hate you so much Yamada Hanataro. Anyone can track me down now because of the trail of blood I keep leaving behind. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: in pain/my bandage itches)

March 9, Wednesday, 9:58pm

I'm still bleeding goddamnit! That 69 guy (yeah you read right it is Shuuhei) noticed my bloody neck. He told me to put some ice on it or stitch it up. I am most definetly not stitching up my hand!... Oh shoot, I'm running out of ice again. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: still in bloody pain/numb, stupid ice)

March 10, Thursday, 11:26pm

I got stitched today. Just because I fucking stained Kuchiki's haori with blood does NOT mean you can knock me out and take me to 4th division! Yeah that means you Renji! You fat bastard my head hurts! My previouslygraceful hand now looks hideous. At least when my hand was bleeding and swelling it still looked good! Damn you Yamada Hanataro. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: fuming/if you comment about my hand I'll break your nose)

**Hm. I like how this chapter turned out, I wrote this in sweltering heat. Thanks for reading! Review and I'll give you a cookie!**


	14. Entry 14

**I'm really sorry if I'm late in updating... I'll make it up with some more chapters coming this weekend :). It'd be nice if you, the reader, liked this chapter enough to review me. Luv ya!**

March 11, Friday, 11:11pm

Whoo hoo! This "ipod" and "pop music" from the real world is really good! I mean, I listen to it every hour, on the hour. It's so... addicting. My ears have never been happier though. This "ipod" thingie is my new best friend, and it's not a bitch! My favorites are Houki Boshi, Asterisk, After Dark, Orange, and many more! I'm very fond of Ichiriin no hana. It's so... "rock-like". I dunno. Oh and I even saw Yamada Hanataro down the hall a while ago, and I didnt even try to trip him! I mean this "ipod" thing is really suppressing my frustration and anger. I guess I have to turn... it... of..f... now... Anytime now... Maybe listening to it till morning is not a bad idea... Good night "ipod". Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: ..I'm in a good mood/my ears are hurting.)

March 12, Saturday, 9:09pm

This stupid ipod wont work anymore! I think I need some more "batteries". Whatever that is. Anyway I accidentally burned it. Actually it was cut in half before it broke. Stupid hollows... Screeching that loud ugly roar throughout Rukongai... Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: frustrated/angry)

March 13, Sunday, 7:32pm

I miss you "ipod"... Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: bored/depressed)

March 14, Monday, 10:57pm

I think I really want to set Renji's hair on fire, no really. I was walking down this path, then I saw Renji shunpoing and actually spat on me! That red-headed retard! He just turned his head and spat without looking! I swear, tomorrow will be the day he regret spitting on me. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go to 12th division for some flammable items. Signed, Haruzaki Morio (mood: enraged/want to set Renji's hair on fire)

**This is it for now, I think you know what's going to happen next. As always, thanks for reading! Your reviews are also very appreciated. **


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